(LOVING) TO THE EXTREME

 

 

Romans 12:9-21

 

Intro

 

Love is an easy thing to talk about: it’s a hard thing to actually live.  The people whom Paul was writing to in this letter to the Romans knew this as much as anyone that you may know or think of.  The Roman church consisted largely of a Gentile population and while there had to have been Jewish members of the church, they were most certainly outnumbered by their non-Jewish counterparts. 

 

The thing that we need to remember, however, is that this church, in the scope of the larger Roman society, had to have been considered, especially when Paul is composing these thoughts in the mid to late first century, not much more than an afterthought: a small little sect of people who were off doing their own thing and if that thing got in the way of where the greater society was moving, well, then that small little sect of people would be removed and eliminated from the equation of life.  You throw that variable into your life and how you love, especially love of those who do not believe what you believe, becomes something that is incredibly hard to conceive of, let alone implement.

 

And yet, that is exactly what Paul is putting before the Roman church.  Allow your love to be felt by everyone you meet: obviously your family and friends, and your brothers and sisters in the faith, but more importantly to love those who don’t love you.  Paul is saying that we need to love to the extreme. 

 

Again, easier said than done, but if we look at the example of the one who we know as Lord and Savior, an example that we realize was absolutely set for us, we are shown where our steps must go. 

 

So how are we going to follow through and live by the example that Jesus set and Paul articulated?  How are we going to follow through and love to the extreme?   The scripture reads this way. 

 

Romans 12:9-21

       

9 Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; 10 love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honor. 11 Do not lag in zeal, be ardent in spirit, serve the Lord. 12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer. 13 Contribute to the needs of the saints; extend hospitality to strangers.

14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly; do not claim to be wiser than you are. 17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. 18 If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. 19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave room for the wrath of God; for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” 20 No, “if your enemies are hungry, feed them; if they are thirsty, give them something to drink; for by doing this you will heap burning coals on their heads.” 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

 

“(Loving) To the Extreme”

 

So where were you …last Sunday…say at around 7:30 AM?  In most cases we’d have to take a moment of pause and think for a second.  But not this year!  Oh no, this year, we are able to remember the last Sunday in August without any issues whatsoever, because this year, we were still waiting for a Hurricane to blow through, many of us were without power, and a whole lot of us were dealing with water in places that we never want to see water.

 

I fit into all of the categories I just mentioned.  As the sun came up, I went downstairs to see how far the waters had risen in the basement.  We had about 3 ˝ inches.  We had talked with all our neighbors the night before so they knew that if the power went out, we’d need to plug into their generator.  So as I was heading out, Sal, our neighbor was coming across.  A few minutes later we were plugged into his generator and a river began to be created by the sump pump.  Then I went over to the church.  I came in, flipped on a light switch (habits are hard to break) and went downstairs.  I couldn’t see much but what I did see was reflecting off of the 4 inches of water that filled the entire basement.  Half an hour later (about 8:45), Jen and I were over at the Bulik’s to see if they had a generator that we could borrow to get the church’s sump pump working.  They did. 

 

As people began to show up to church they all asked how they could help.  Extensions chords were procured, three additional emergency pumps were brought in, coffee was brewed and purchased, and, after a short worship service where we talked about Noah (come on, you had to see that one coming!), a conga line of furniture and materials began coming up the steps.  Individuals who had been up all night dealing with flooding in their own homes and their extended families’ homes came to carry stuff up.  People used brooms and squiggies to push the water to the pumps to get it out.  By 1:15 in the afternoon, everything that could be done, had been done. 

 

It was an absolute wonder to behold the love of people as they sacrificed of themselves so as to help the church.  I walked away that afternoon tired but so utterly reassured that God is in this place, working in and through us to do things that we could not do on our own.

And that’s important, because the message that Paul is saying to the church in Rome and to all of those believers who subsequently read these words is, “Believers in Jesus!  We need to be like Jesus!  Yes, we need to love our families and friends (which is absolutely what was on display this past Sunday), but our love needs to go to the extreme: we even need to love those who hate us.  We need to be willing to pray for and even care for those who want us to fall.” 

 

We need to do this because it is the only true way to ultimately overcome the evil that we encounter in those who hate us.

 

Another quick hurricane story: I was talking with a guy who needed some ice.  He found out that a place over Flemington way had some and he went over and asked how much it cost.  He was told $6.50 a bag.  He just looked at the shop owner and thought, “you’ve got to be kidding me!”  So he asked, “what do you normally sell it for?”  He was told, bluntly, “I’ve got the ice, you want the ice: the price is what the price is.”  This upped the ante and not to be outdone, the guy who needed the ice replied, “what I want to do is buy a bag so I can beat you over the head with it.”  Let’s just say, no ice was sold in that exchange.

 

But so often all of us get caught up into the mentality of an eye for an eye.  You hurt me so I’m going to hurt you.  Many times it’s even over the smallest of concerns. 

 

Here’s the thing: that isn’t scriptural.  What we find in scripture, as articulated in these words by Paul is that only a radical love, the radically extreme love that was exhibited through the actions of Jesus Christ, this is the only thing that will cause the cycle of violence, of hatred, of sinfulness to come to an end.  Violence in response to violence will not end it.  Anger in response to anger only engenders …more anger. 

 

Look at the history of the world and what you see are people who are not only fighting because they felt they were wronged, but because their parents, grandparents, follow it as far down the lineage chain as you would like, but it is in response to some previous wrong.  The culture that we have perpetuated here in the United States makes this sort of “punch back or be punched out” mentality almost a requirement.  When I watch the local news at night, what I hear are stories of people who are stealing, killing, retaliating, because they feel like they have been wronged, and that they don’t have a choice.  A daughter is gunned down by a ‘stray’ bullet that was fired in the direction of a guy who shoved the shooters girlfriend.  A fight breaks out at a football game, not on the field, but in the stands, and in the parking lot as fans take the excitement of a game and channel it into life and death actions because they didn’t want to be disrespected.  A husband hits his wife and says that he did it, “because she was mouthing off at me.” 

 

Violence at the drop of a hat.  Violence as a first response.  It doesn’t work.  Big situations, little situations, it doesn’t matter what kind of situations, the only thing that can break the cycle of sinful anger, violence, and even hatred that we have created is when people decide to love to the extreme, and that means stepping out and risking to even love those who come against you.        

 

You may think that it is way too oversimplified but why do we think that?  I think at least part of the reason is that our society has conditioned us to think that those who love are weak.  But I’m sorry as I look through the pages of scriptures, what I see is that the only chance that we have of breaking the cycle of sinful retribution, and sin-filled anger is by loving to the extreme.  Jesus was hanging on the cross, being derided by both his Roman captors and his fellow Israelites and he looks up to the sky and says, “forgive them Father, for they know not what they do.”  He didn’t look down at them and say, “my day is coming, and when it does, your day is done.”  That is a radical example of what it means to love.

 

Now obviously, when that sort of an example gets rolled out there many of us begin to ask the question, “Yeah, but what can I do?  That was the Son of God hanging on that cross.  I could never do that.  What could I do to exemplify this radical sort extreme love?”

 

Well, for one, you’ve got to work at it.  You can’t think that you can love to the extreme right out of the gate every single time.  That would be like watching a highly trained athlete do what they do and say, “I can do that” and then be disappointed when you aren’t quite as good as those athletes.  They had to work at!  So do we!

 

So here are a couple of examples that may make sense to you or someone you know as to how to love to the extreme.  How many of you when you’re out driving on the road, have ever had someone cut you off?  What’s your reaction?  I have to admit that there have been too many times when I have responded to that action by acting like a NASCAR driver and getting so close to that person’s back bumper that it feels like I’m in their back seat.  I’ve heard others blow horns or some other variation of road rage. 

 

What if, instead, we take a breath and display a radical form of love and instead of tailgating, we give the person the space they did not give us?  Loving to the extreme is not easy but when it is practiced it can become who we are.

 

Have you ever had someone use language toward you that was disrespectful?  How have you responded?  Many of us go right back at them, unloading a verbal barrage that only ups the ante. 

 

What if, instead, we respond to that person with the respect they did not show us?  Stand up for yourself but do it in a way that love is displayed instead of anger being returned.  Loving to the extreme is not easy but when it is practiced it can become who we are.

 

Prior to the hurricane I was standing in one of the really long lines that were all over the place.  They were the sort of lines where almost everyone is antsy and grumbly.  I only had a couple of items.  The man in front of me had a cart that had maybe 15 items.  So he didn’t have a lot.  It was one of those things where you do what you have to do to get what you need.  Well, the man kept looking at me and my stuff and as we got to the point where he was the next person to be waited on he turned to me again and said, “you’ve only got a couple of things, go ahead.”  I tried to say no, but he insisted.  I went ahead.  As I was being checked out.  He looked at the next person in line, who was an elderly lady and without hesitation, he once again, gave up his place so that someone else might be helped along.  He didn’t know any of us, and in the midst of a situation where no one would think twice about him keeping his place in line, he gave it up.  In the midst of a situation where everyone is thinking about themselves, here was a gentleman who was thinking about others, and loving them the best that he could.

 

We are called to love and even called to love those who hurt us.  Not to spurn them but to embrace them with the love of Jesus Christ.  It is this sort of love that will break the cycle of sinfulness that we too often perpetuate.  Jesus showed us the way to live.  Paul spoke about it in his passage to the Roman church.  This is the sort of love that each of us needs to work at on a daily, hourly, minute-by-minute basis.  If we do, if we allow this sort of loving to the extreme to exist in who we are, the world will begin to change and change in such a way that the kingdom of God is championed.  Loving to the extreme: let us begin to live it out in the here and now!   

 

After Sermon Prayer

 

Holy and gracious God, we have been taught in so many ways that the best and even only response to hurt is by striking back.  God, help us to come to understand that this is not Your way, that Your way calls us to love the world in a radical way, to the point that we love those who hurt us.  God, help us to live this sort of life.  Let it be so.  Amen.